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U.S. gov't releases zombie
U.S. gov't releases zombie apocalypse survival plan
Here at our shape-shifting DVICE headquarters, we're already pretty zombie-proof. We've got axe-legs on the coffee tables for goodness sake. Still, you can't be over prepared for hordes of shambling, brain-eating undead, so the CDC is right in releasing a survival plan. You know, just in case.
Sadly, the plan proposed by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention doesn't finally put to rest the age old question: firearm, or katana?
Instead, Rear Admiral Ali Khan, the assistant surgeon general at the Office of Public Health Preparedness and Response, drops a lot of practical knowledge on the zombie-fearing masses, knowledge that — suspiciously — would also help during, say, a hurricane or disease outbreak.
So, what do you need? A survival kit filled with water, food, meds and the like. Also, you'll want to have a meeting place picked out so you can find your family and friends and help each other as a group, emergency contacts and — hey, wait a minute! Where are the guns? The blades? The blades duct-taped to guns?
You know what? Sounds like the CDC is going to be screwed when zombies start scratching at the doors. My advice: you want to live, then ask Max Brooks what he'd do.
By Kevin Hall
Tags: cdc zombie apocalypse, cdc, may 21st doomsday, harold camping, may 21st rapture
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